That speaking engagement...

I confirmed with my leader that I am speaking at the Open House/Grand Opening of the new WW location. I am one of six. They have about seven meetings per week at that location so I'm one of a select few. I don't really think I deserve to get this honor because I haven't made it to my goal weight, but if my leader wants me there to speak as a success story I will be there speaking as a success story. I am so excited. I need to get writing and rehearsing! Going to be AWESOME!

Historic Sites I Would Like to Revisit (and an update)

Now that I've lost weight I have some historic places I need to return to. Those places are The Woodstock (concert) site in Bethel NY and Vanderbilt Mansion/FDR Home in Hyde Park, NY.The reason I am writing about this is the fact that I had some kind of hindrance because of my weight and I did n ot enjoy those places as much as I could.

A picture I took at the Roosevelt Home in 2006

In, I believe, 2006 I went to the Hyde Park with my friend AJ and Hubby. We visited both the Vanderbilt Mansion and the FDR house. AJ and Hubby are walkers. They will just walk and walk and walk without giving it a second thought. Where other normal people would tire they'd keep going. They found out about a trail between the two homes. They wanted to do it. I of course didn't want to. It was one of those "I'll just stay in the car" kind of moments. I did a lot of that. I had enough walking just doing the tours of the homes that day. Well, I'm going back, probably this summer, with AJ (and most likely her boyfriend MDP) and Hubby and my camera and I will do the walk. There are 2.2 miles between the two houses according to Google Maps and that's taking the driving route. Hubby proposed that I walk it and they come pick me up at the end. I think I might be able to do it round trip! Of course when I do it, you will hear about it here

Me sitting on the Woodstock hill.
If you look closely you can see
my bad editing to make myself look
thinner. Yes, I was fatter
than that.

Another place I want  to return to is the Woodstock site in Bethel. It was a bucket list thing to go to the site. The museum is nice, kinda small and not too exciting. However, the actual site, which is in the backyard of the museum is just awesome. I really enjoyed sitting in the grass on the hill and envisioning the concert stage in front of me. Why I want to return is the fact I did stay outside as long as I could have. I got tired and wanted to go back to the museum so we could get information about a place, of all things, to eat dinner at. I was really huffing and puffing going up that hill and I really didn't think I was going to make it back to the museum. The museum is like about 300 feet from the top of the hill and I had to stop a few times. The Woodstock hill is surprisingly small.

I have gained so much by losing weight. Last night I enjoyed just moving. I don't remember ever enjoying moving for the sake of moving.. I guess I might have taken it for granted when I was thinner. In time I hope to start to hike mountains again too and I'm going to be buying a bike soon too.

As a follow up to my post last night. Here is a picture of me wearing my Mooby's shirt at the movies in 2009. I'm sure you can guess what movie I was going to see. I know it fit me then because I had it buttoned up. I should have taken a picture of me wearing it last night. I'll get one at another time. I'll do a side by side when I do.

Tiny little weight loss gripe.

So I'm getting to the point where all of my favorite clothes are either too big for me or getting too big for me. I'm getting ready to get rid of loads of 30/32 and 26/28 clothing. My gripe is about one of my most loved shirts, my "Mooby's" shirt. If you're a Kevin Smith fan or you've seen some of his movies, specially "Dogma" and "Clerks II" you know what I mean. I have the same exact purple bowling shirt that is worn in the movie "Clerks II".

The stars of "Clerks II" wearing the shirt I'm talking about

 I bought it in Red Bank, NJ at Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash while on our "Kevin Smith Tour" years ago. So, it is a very special shirt. I spent lots of money on it too. I went years without wearing it because it was too small and now it's getting too big.


Tonight I was out with Hubby and two friends and I looked at myself in the mirror while in a bathroom and I looked like I had a husband who is bigger than I am right now and I was wearing his clothes (we don't have a full length mirror at home and it didn't look that bad in the bathroom mirror at home). Although I do intend on wearing some of hubby's t-shirts when I am small enough, which isn't too far away. He does have an awesome t-shirt collection. I don't like how my Mooby's shirt looks on me.

Me during our "Kevin Smith Tour" outside the most
famous Mini Mart ever, The Quick Stop from "Clerks"

Guess I might do some sewing I guess. As much as I hate to sew it really outweighs the frustration of having to stop wearing my shirt or keep wearing it like it looks on me right now.

Ok, it's late and this was a rather lame attempt at  a post, but there you have it.

As always, thank you for reading.

New job

Couldn't come up with any cute way of titling this so there ya go.

Just wanted to drop a note.

So, as much a I like my current job I am moving on to a job with more opportunity and better pay. I will be working for a health insurance company starting next month. I'm writing about this on my blog for a few reasons...

1. I want to brag and share my news
2. I wanted to mention how I will have a long walk from my car to my desk so I'll be getting a lot more exercise than I am now at my current job.
3. They have an awesome cafeteria so I'm getting ready to ditch the Weight Watchers frozen meals which could leave room for problems. However, I will be working on the top floor and the cafeteria is on the first floor. It's much more expensive and time consuming to go down to the cafeteria, so I think I'm sticking to my WW meals because I will only have a thirty minute lunch anyway.

So there, it's weight loss related after all ;-) That's all for now. Thank you for reading.

The Expos Jersey

So I wore my Expos Jersey for the first time in eight years because I can finally fit in to it and in the honor of Gary Carter. Here's the picture.

Forgive the crappy quality of the camera. Want to get a smart phone soon so I can use the WW app and take better pictures. Wearing this jersey was a goal and a milestone. So happy!

An Ode to "The Kid"

If you've read my blog enough you know if I want to write about a topic and I can find someway to tie it in to food, weight loss, body image, etc. I'll write about it. Well, tonight I'm going to tie it in to baseball and the passing of Hall of Famer Gary Carter.

I have been a baseball fan pretty much all of my life. I went to my first major league baseball game in the late 70's, I was four. It was a Montreal Expos game. I of course grew up in a small New York town an hour south of Montreal. That day I started the longest love affair I have ever, my love for the Montreal Expos.  From then on I saw at least one game a year ( I think my record was four in one year) up until 2002. That was my last game. They may be remembered as the laughing stock in baseball , but the Expos in their heyday were amazing. Of course the guy who stands out the most is Gary Carter. He was probably the most loved Montreal Expo ever. He was a great player, a man of class, full of charm and had a wonderful smile. I have to admit. I think part of my love for him as a player were his good looks.  He was with the Expos for ten years, '74-'84. He then came back for his final year in baseball, 1992. I have many fond memories of  watching him play.

My Maternal Grandmother and I would call him "Gare-ree!" because of how the announcer would say his name "Gare-ree Car-tare". I even had a Sports Illustrated poster of him on my wall when I was a kid. Granted, he was wearing a Mets uniform in it but it was still my "Gare-ree!". The last time I saw Gary he was at the 2010 National Baseball Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony in Cooperstown. I find it fitting that the last time I saw him was when they were honoring his long time teammate Andre Dawson. Carter and Dawson are the only Montreal Expos in the HOF and might turn out to be the only ones ever.

So what does this have to do with my weight loss? Well, I know I've said a few places that I can finally fit into my Montreal Expos Jersey. I think the last time it fit me the Expos were still a team. The Expos haven't been a team for almost 8 years now. Tomorrow will be the first time I've worn it since then. I'll wear it with pride and a heavy heart. RIP Gary. Thanks for the memories. You will be missed. The world needs more Gary Carters.

It's all about the love

So I'll make this quick. It's late and I want to go to bed. Last night I said I was invited to speak at the WW grand opening. Well, I realized today my leader never said speaking. Just said she wanted me there as a success story. So I'll need to clarify with her at my next meeting.

Also today at work they were passing out donuts for Valentine's Day and I ate one. If you want to know why I'm writing about that go here. At first I declined because I wanted to save points for dinner with hubby. Then I realized I had my weeklies. So I indulged in my first donut since I started WW.

Also of course today is Valentine's Day. I've gotten to the point in my life that I hate the pressure put on people to buy something for Valentine's Day. I believe you should express your love every day to the people you love in your life. Today at work at least four women got some kind of delivery whether it was a balloon or flowers or whatever. I kinda felt a bit jealous. I've never had flowers delivered to me at work and I've had the kind of job  where flowers can be delivered to me for years now because I have a desk!. Then I realized something. Today was the day I was getting my rings back after getting them resized because I went a size and a half down in ring size. I think that's one of the best Valentine's Day present I've ever gotten and it doesn't require counting points;)

Also I want to express my gratitude for my husband's support and love over the last two years while losing weight. He's been so wonderful and is my personal cheerleader. I couldn't ask for anything more. I'm so lucky. I hope you're as lucky as I am on this day devoted to love and I hope you know he/she loves and makes you feel special every day of the year, just like husband does for me;-)

Happy Valentine's Day! XO

Thank you for reading.

Lots and Lots O' News!

So. Had a HUGE night at my meeting. I've lost 5 pounds. Yes. even if I went off points on Thursday night. So I have another paperclip to add to the chain. The weight loss total is 107 lbs. I have four more pounds to  go to lose more weight than my leader has! I thought I was 3 lbs from my halfway, but I was wrong I'm 13 lbs away from halfway.  My leader gave me an official  framed WW certificate commemorating my 100 lb loss signed by my leader and the CEO of WW (Probably Autopen for the CEO).  I was wondering what my Leader wanted my full name for at the last meeting!

Best of all...

I'll be speaking at the Grand Opening the new WW meeting location as a Success story. YES! ME! SUCCESS STORY! I think I'll say "I'm sure you're wondering why this fat woman is standing in front of you as a success story". Then I'll pull out my old 30/32 jeans. I might pass some pictures around too. Looking forward to writing that and delivering it.

And finally...

In the not so good news department. This is really just a footnote really...

Since I'm losing weight so fast, I talked to my leader and I'm adjusting my points. I lost 4 pounds the week I arrived at 100lbs, then the .6 gain and then 5 lb loss. Yikes. As much a I love WW and losing weight I don't want to lose weight THAT fast.

Thanks for reading!

Weight Loss Interview Series : Carol Helms

This is the first in an ongoing series of weight loss interviews.  These are real life friends and internet friends. They lost on their own, on Weight Loss Plans, surgery, etc. People from all around the world in all walks of life. Every person was given the same set of questions and they did not need to answer some  of them if they didn't want to.  The first person to be featured is Carol Helms. I've known Carol for at least twenty five years. Makes me feel old. I went to school with her children, her daughter and I had mutual friends too. Carol also knows my Mom. When  I received Carol's I was very pleased. Most of the people who have answered the questions have given short answers. Carol also answered the questions as requested. She also went above and beyond and wrote a blog post worthy answer . Here it is as written by her:

Name:   Carol (Hickok) (Kalvaitis) Helms

I know you because you went to school with my kids and I know your mom. 

Favorite tv show: NCIS (I’m gaga over Mark Harmon), my musical taste is very eclectic …I am a child of the 60’s l like the moldy oldies, but a lot of newer things too.  In general, I would rather read than watch movies.  It is very rare that they have made a movie out of a really good book and not messed it up horribly.

I live in Austin, Texas, married to my best friend.

My hometown is Ballston Spa, NY, but going to Plattsburgh, NY for college, I wound up staying in the area for 31 years.

My weight loss history— I’ve always been fat, in my mind.  In high school I was about 20 lbs over weight, but I might as well of weighed 400 lbs the way I felt about myself.  I was also an honor student.  I graduated 8^th in a class of 142, but I felt stupid and inferior, because there were others smarter than me and I wasn’t perfect.  Yesterday I caught a few minutes of Dr. Oz’s show with Rosie O’Donnell as a guest.  She said, “I’m smart.  I know what to do…but I’m screwed up.” Dr. Oz said, “Welcome to humanity.”

After I got married and had kids, I gained weight, like many.  That was the first time I got over 200 lbs.  I spent years playing the weight game.  I would lose 25 lbs and gain back 35.  Than lose 35 and gain back 50…….etc.  I tried everything including: Weight Watchers (multiple times), Diet workshop, Tops, the Blackburn Diet, Liquid protein diets, counting calories, carbs and anything else someone would suggest counting.  I am very knowledgeable about nutrition.  I also tried every idiot diet plan I found in magazines, etc.  I never once reached my goal and always gained back more than I lost.  I would both sabotage myself and my first husband would sabotage me.  He was always supportive when I started a new diet, but when I started looking good and getting positive feedback from others, he got jealous and would suddenly start bringing home all kinds of crap (pizza, donuts, etc) and deciding to take me out to dinner.  That would always happen when I had reached a plateau and was getting discouraged and I would cave.  Then my mindset would be:  “ I blew it.  I’m not perfect.  So it doesn’t matter what I do.”

I also did a lot of overeating for two reasons:

1-     As a passive-aggressive way to show my husband that he can’t control me

2-     As a way of self-medicating my self into oblivion to control my depression.     

It took 24 years to grow enough backbone to finally leave my husband.  By then I was in 3/X4 clothes.  I don’t give weight numbers out, but I think that gives a good idea.

In spite of my size, I was still in relatively good health.  Ok, I got short of breath grocery shopping and I hadn’t been to a grown-up movie in years.  (I would force my self to take my grandkids to the movies, where I wedged myself into the seat and was in total pain through the whole thing.  When the movie was over, I would pry myself off the seat and have to stand there holding on for a couple of minutes until I had enough circulation in my legs to be able to walk.  I would still have ridges on my hips, from the arm rests, when I got home.

Then came the day when my doctor informed me, after some routine blood work, that I had diabetes.  It turned out to be “pre-diabetes”, but it was enough to scare me.  I’ve worked in health care and have helped care for several people who were dying from complications of diabetes.  For the first time I got really serious about having to do something.

About that time, a co-worker had gastric by-pass surgery.  I thought that seemed a bit too drastic, but promised to keep and opened mind and research it.  I was working at Albany Medical Center at the time and they have a support group for people who have had the procedure and for those considering it.  It is actually mandatory for those considering it.  I started attending the weekly meetings, as well as reading books and researching on line and talking to several people who had had the surgery.  I also starting working with a nutritionist (also mandatory prior to surgery) and dieting to lose at least 10% of my start weight so I would qualify to have the surgery. 

On March 23, 2003, I had roux-n-Y gastric by-pass surgery.    (Along with leaving my ex.)  I felt great.   I was steadily losing weight and more importantly,  gaining self-confidence and self- worth.  

On June 23, 2003, I had my routine annual mammogram.  At the time, I worked in the radiology dept of Albany Med, and was in the habit of pulling up my own reports and printing them to have my own records.  I came into work the next morning, pulled up my report expecting the usual “routine screening exam, no significant changes.  Recommend continue with annual exams”  Instead, I read, “ 3mm lesion highly suspicious for malignancy.  Recommend biopsy.” ….and I thought that the diabetes thing had grabbed my attention!

For the next several months I dealt with breast cancer treatment, while continuing to lose weight.  By the time I finished with the cancer treatment, I was down to a size 16 (except for the fact that my left boob was a G cup due to radiation edema--temporary).  I had lost a total of 175 lbs.  I have since gained back about 20 lbs, but have maintained that for 8 years.  I am between sizes 18 & 20.  After many years at 3X & 4X, I feel fabulous.  As important as the weight loss, is the change in my attitude and outlook.  I do not have to be perfect.  I feel strong, capable and confident.  I refuse to feel guilty about anything I eat.  I don’t believe in forbidden foods, but enjoying foods that are less healthy sparingly on occasion. 

In 2005 a dear friend, who I had known for 30 years came up north from Texas to attend a class reunion.  He stopped to visit while he was up there.  We had stayed in touch, but hadn’t seen each other in 17 years.  A year later….and amazing year later…..at the tender age of 57, I married my best friend and moved to Austin, TX.  Our lives have been busy and often crazy, but we do it together.  I know this sounds crazy in a weight loss history, and I’m not going to even try to explain how it came about, but every night, before we go to sleep, my husband and I sit on our bed with a carton of ice cream and two spoons.  We sit and talk and have a couple of spoonfuls of ice cream.  It has become one of the most important parts of our day.  I still weigh exactly what I weighed when we got married in July 2006.

I am now 62 and I am dealing with a decision of whether or not to have knee replacement surgery.  Year of being very obese didn’t help the osteoarthritis, but I believe my weight loss has enabled me to postpone this for a lot longer than I would’ve been able to. 

Live goes on and I know I can handle whatever I need to.

Wendy and the horrible week.

Well, of course my week started off with a dead hot water heater and I called in to work. I'm still sick and worst of all I went over points knowingly. It wasn't a huge amount of points, but still. Had a few other unfortunate things happen I'm not going to mention. It's all about the points.

Thursday night we went to a little sushi place we just discovered a few weeks ago. For the record, if you don't know me, Hubby and I love sushi. It's our favorite thing to eat.. Anyway, we ordered a roll which we had never tried before. It ended up being more like a sandwich. It was like at least one cup of sushi rice per piece, there were four pieces. One cup of sushi rice is enough points for a meal. I ate two of them. The average sushi roll piece has about 1/4 cup of rice, in my estimation. The sushi rolls are usually pretty small too. They can be anywhere between the circumference of a quarter to a tennis ball (roughly). Those really big ones are very hard to eat. This was more like a turkey club with the crusts cut off. Two turkey club sandwiches with the crusts cut off.

I was eating that "roll" when I realized I was over points. I mentioned to Hubby early on that "I'm might go over points tonight, just so you know". I'm not sure what possessed me to say that or even do it. Yes, I have extra points. I had used about half of them at a Thai restaurant we'd never tried before on Tuesday. I also had a dove chocolate bar at work, out of the vending machine, the day we went to the sushi place.  I usually do not get food out of the vending machine at work.

About a month or so ago we were talking about "danger zones"  at a WW meeting and how to avoid them. I said "I don't bring any money to work for the vending machine", or something like that. Well, I've had a bunch of ones in my pocket for about week now. Note to self: stop bringing money to work. I also need to stop eating the chocolate on one of my neighbor's desk. I used to be able to avoid her desk, but they moved my desk and now I'm right next to her.

I used excuses when I got chocolate. This past week it was the fact I was sick and I was having trouble focusing so I figured I'd have a little caffeine. The only caffeine I allow myself is chocolate and it's been that way since 1993. I have two medical reasons why I don't allow myself caffeine other than chocolate.

This is not about depriving myself, it's about getting control over my points and managing them better. I need to get back in control. People may think I'm beating myself up over this. I don't really beat myself up over anything. I just think the slightest diversion from the path I'm on is REALLY BAD. This is a big deal! I am not willing to settle for only 100 pounds lost.

The road is starting to get even more rough. I need to regroup. I'm hoping the scale doesn't show my indiscretions. It probably will. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. I'll have to talk to my leader. I know for one thing I haven't been in my right mind since I started to get sick last week. I can't wait to get rid of this crap.

Thanks for reading.

To cupcake or not to cupcake

So here I am, it's Super Bowl (TM) Sunday. I wanted to save a lot of my weeklies for today. Well, I have 25 weeklies, not nearly as many as I wanted to have. I've been looking forward to the cupcakes that are supposed to be at the Super Bowl (TM) party tonight. It's the only food, besides the beer, veggies and fruit we're bringing that I know will be there. Cupcakes can be 20 points, at least that is what my birthday cupcake was. All depends on how much frosting is on them. Since we are bringing fruit and veggies I'm gonna be ok if I get low on points.

Like my leader said on Monday this is no different than a holiday. In fact, she said it is a holiday. I was ok at Christmas because my Mom is on WW and we had Christmas dinner at her house. So for the most part I was eating food that was not that high in points. That's of course not the case with tonight.

This of course if my first Super Bowl (TM) party on WW. There are going to be a lot of dangerous things there. I feel like I'm going in to a battle zone. Good thing I don't eat chicken wings. If those are on the menu I can avoid them. I'm a bit nervous and worried about tonight. I'm taking it easy on my points so far. I have 35 left for the day, out of 43, been eating lots of fruit.

On top of it all, and I don't like to whine about my health on my blog, but this is pertinent to today, I'm sick. I just want to eat and eat for comfort today. So this is going to be an interesting night. I've really been looking forward to this. It will be fun! I like how I'm thinking about strategy before I go. Proof I've learned a thing or two from WW.

I think I might be psyching myself out and too worried about this. I think that .6 gain affected me more than I thought it did. I'll of course post a post Super Bowl (TM) party entry on here to tell you how I did. I think I'm gonna be ok. I'm just not as prepared as I'd like to be.

One short walk for sushi, one giant leap for me

So Hubby and I are on a search for the best sushi place in the Capital Region. We almost always eat Sushi with my Stepson, Stepdaughter, Stepson in law and Granddaughter and we had a bad experience at our favorite sushi place. So, we are a sushi loving  family, so we're on a mission.

Last night we tried a place in Albany on New Scotland. Last night there weren't any places available on New Scotland so we had to park on a side street and walk. I had no problem with it. As I said to my husband when we got out of the vehicle "In the old days I'd be bitching about parking so far away" to which he responded "We might not have even tried this in the past".

There was a time when I would have wanted to park in front of a place, otherwise I wouldn't want to go. We'd end up going anyway, but it was an effort on my part to walk there and I'd get all stressed out about having to walk "that far". Back in those days it really wasn't "that far".

When we got the door of the sushi place last night I just could have kept happily walking and walking. Back in the day I would have been thrilled to have arrived at my destination and dreaded having to walk back once the visit was done.

As a footnote Hubby said that I might have had him pick me up at the door.

Amazing how far I've come.

PS: We've started a blog about our quest for good sushi in the Capital Region here

The flying wedding ring and the Super Bowl(TM)

There are some times when I think I'm going run out of things to talk about on here. Then, life happens!


So, if you follow me on Twitter you  know what happened to my wedding ring today. Here's more detail. I've mentioned how my office has food available quite often. Well, today we had cookies. I went to get a "fudgie" (only locals will get that, although the Cookie Factory doesn't call them that) and I went to get a paper towel I had in my desk for just such an occasion. It was crumpled so I went to 'flick' it to get it to lie flat. Well, my wedding ring flew off my finger and landed about five feet behind me. I was shocked. I knew my rings were loose. As it is I take my engagement ring off because it's pretty big and it will slide around my finger as I type during the day. I didn't think my rings were loose enough to fly off my finger. Gotta call the jewelry place tomorrow. It's all ready been a long week I'm REALLY looking forward to the weekend, specially Sunday!

This week's WW meeting mainly centered around the Super Bowl (TM). My leader did the cutest thing. She asked if we were going to be a running back and various other football positions and it all ended with the fact we could end up with a tight end. The reason I'm talking about this is the fact that I'm going to a Super Bowl (TM) party on Sunday. I don't really like football. In fact, I hated football until my ex-husband explained it to me. I even kinda enjoyed football for a while there. To this day I'm a baseball and hockey girl. Notice I didn't say football. Even if hubby (he's a baseball guy) and I watch the Super Bowl (TM) for the commercials I still I cheer against the Patriots. My good friend AJ is a HUGE Patriots fan and she's hosting the party with her boyfriend MDP.  She had one last time the Pats were in the Super Bowl (TM)(against the Giants) and we had a blast. So I'm going to the party and I'm saving weeklies. I have 44 out of 49 so far. I understand there will be cupcakes there, made by my friend Laurie, so there's at least 20 points right there. I'm bringing fruit or veggies. Yes, I know, LAME, but hey, it's my backup "just in case" because they are zero points.  I'm also bringing some caffeine free Diet Coke. Really looking forward to it. GO GIANTS!

As a side note: I was going to say that I was thinking about becoming a Pats fan because they're the only Boston team I don't cheer for. Then I realized I forgot about the Bruins. I'm a Canadiens fan. So I'm ok with not cheering for the all of the Boston teams:-p